CHRISSY.CITY

my city, my rules

past

  • Drafts

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    These are some drafts that I rarely revisit or tweak. They all felt complete. 📝 ONE Six years ago, me and three of my girlfriends did yoga on my deck. We each set up our phones at the top of our mats and pressed play. It was the final class from a thirty-day challenge I…

  • Tagging my dreams 🎧

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    I couldn’t find my silky sleep mask and was too tired to look for it, so guess who had trouble sleeping? When I finally fell asleep I was treated to unsettling dreams. I’ve noticed this recurring dream pattern for me, where I’m responsible for my niece. I used to regularly dream of a towering wave.…

  • The Little Drop 🎧

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    In savasana, I am the worst. At a recent yin yoga session, as we rolled up our mats and put away blocks and blankets, our instructor said, “Much better. I can feel the vibration in here is less chaotic.” My main character energy (flaw) assumed I was the chaos. I was certainly feeeeeling it before…

  • Boxing 🎧

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    Back in December, I signed up for a boxing class but had to cancel due to a lower back situation. I kept wondering when I’d sign up again. The owners were super engaging—not in a pushy way. But January had me tending to core work. I dedicated a lot of time to high planks (favorite),…

  • Meatball Harry 🎧

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    My emotions are much louder than hers. Sometimes I wonder if I come off as inauthentic, but as I age, so ages my conviction, and I know that I’m not. Next to her, I’m a weeping willow: emotive, romantic, maybe a bit dramatic. But she’s a windswept cypress tree. Uncommon and haunting. They’re not showy…

  • Summer Baby

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    It’s too cold for late March in Tampa. I want to be hot. Not in a climate change kinda way (zero waste / vegan, please). I want my skin exposed to warmth wrapping around me. I want the privilege of knowing that whatever space I put myself in can be cooled when I feel like…

  • Gertrude 🎧

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    I’m procrastinating. I have about four hours (or more, depending on my focus level) of homework that I could have spaced out between today and yesterday, but instead, I spent yesterday lying in the sunshine, doing laundry, and fake-reluctantly agreeing to a delivery from our favorite vegan restaurant in Tampa. This is supposedly my nineteenth…

  • Rituals

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    The end of our walk starts with my daily encouragement to hurry Gigi home by telling her she’s going to get second breakfast. This doesn’t really help at all (she still stops and sticks her face in every damn thing), nor does it discourage her from barking at the passing cars or bike riders on…

  • 인연 🎧

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    For my Humanities class, I had to pick a film and a scene within it that I thought best summed up the themes. Here’s SOME of my assignment! For no one’s interest, but mine! Allow me to tell you how much I hate/love working full time, balancing movement/fitness classes, the stress of a Trump era…

  • Major Signs

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    Have you ever gone to bed with the dried, sticky sweat still on your body from a workout? No? You’re not disgusting? I don’t recommend it. It’s that sneaky reminder that: depression is back, time to put your gloves on. I woke up with a panicky prognosis from my Oura ring: “Your biometrics show major…

  • Maxine 🎧

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    I haven’t felt much like writing for a bit. I got caught up in an early morning yoga and meditation routine that I thought was serving me, but I don’t know. A friend said to me recently that sometimes you can do the healthiest things and still feel terrible, and that makes feeling terrible all…

  • Pass-a-Grille

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    I love shell landscaping instead of grass. I love sea grapes and their round bright yellow green leaves. I love man made sand dollars or sea turtles instead of boring stepping stones that lead to a house with pastel colors and a coordinated mailbox made to also look like a house. I love tackily painted…

  • a Picture

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    today Gigi had her Silky Terrier (aka prone to tartar and plaque) teeth cleaned and I felt lost without her. I fell in a Whole Foods parking lot (cut open one knee, scraped the other) and bounced up as quickly as I hit the asphalt. I (laughably) hobbled around inside and wondered why it’s so…

  • You’re number one 🎧

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    One of our clients has Alzheimer’s, and her children are having to put her in memory care. I also learned that, unbeknownst to her, she has stage four brain cancer. Sometimes I wonder how I ended up in a career like this—one where life events pop up often enough to force you into a headspace…

  • Paper-Cut Hearts

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    I love February. I’m a sucker for the colors of Valentine’s Day and all the sweetness that comes with the holiday. I don’t know why, I just think it’s cute. I’m still off social media. Okay, sometimes, at work, I’d skim my (finally deactivated) Twitter feed (which is mostly astrology content creators and X-Files fans),…

  • Chickadee 🎧

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    I woke up two days ago thinking about the way my Grandpop Tom sounded when he called us “chickadee.” He was an aeronautical engineer who spent World War II repairing airplanes on base in Morocco until the war was over. But I remember him differently (as a child might) since we lost him to cancer…

  • Write a Letter

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    I’m a big fan of letters— writing them and receiving them. I receive them less often than I write them, but what can you do? When I was in high school, I spent most of my time ignoring the recommended reading and focusing on my own curriculum. I preferred female writers from the Regency, Victorian…

  • Closer to the Sky

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    I don’t want to write about Barbra Streisand. For one thing, I can’t say anything that someone else hasn’t already said, probably in a more refined and knowledgeable way. I don’t regularly listen to her music. But since listening to her audiobook, I’ve found myself curious enough to download The Second Barbra Streisand Album. I…

  • Detaching from Socials

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    The first month of 2025 found me breaking up with social media just ten days in. And gosh, what freedom. I know we shouldn’t look away from the things affecting our communities, and I won’t. But the disconnection from the endless stream of content created by people who are also consuming endless content? It’s a…

  • January Song 🎧

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    It’s a dreary Sunday morning, fog and a white-gray sky making the warm temperature seem contradictory. Thankfully, there’s an intermittent breeze, light and cool enough to be comfortable as Gigi and I head out for our regular walk. Sometimes we go through the apartments across the street from our home. She loves this because there…

  • Dream Logic

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    I’ve been having weird and vivid dreams lately, which is one of my favorite things. What makes them more frequent? We know increased REM sleep is usually the main thing. When our sleep cycles are consistent, this can happen. Another cause can be stress or anxiety, or even sleep disorders that make a person wake…

  • Securely Aware

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    Most of us with pets understand this feeling: That sinking dread when you calculate how many years you have left. Maybe if I had a secure attachment style, or I obeyed certain aspects of letting go, I’d find myself calmly rationalizing how many walks I have left. How many couch cuddles and games of fetch…

  • Hi Reader

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    I’ve linked this blog to several social media sites I rarely use (except for messaging), but it still means that if someone who knows me searches for me, they might find it. They might read this. Over a decade ago, I worked a closing shift at Starbucks, surrounded by faces that felt like family. One…

  • Something To Keep

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    If there’s anything I know for certain about writing, it’s two things. The first thing is tied up in my insecurities. The second thing is this: You can’t force it. Still, here I am, working on my daily writing prompt, intending to press “Publish” at the end. Yesterday I wrote about the reasons we write.…

  • Daily Writing (001)

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    Do I think I’ll write daily up to a hundred times this year? That would be cool. I’ve thought about journaling more and more recently. I used to do it in my twenties (handwritten and all) without hesitation. The year I was dumped, I filled up an entire velvet-covered book. It’s one of my most…

  • Quiet Attempts

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    Sometimes I read a poem about something ordinary (like the description of an orange) and feel nothing. I catch myself judging it, as though its ordinariness is offensive. Then, I think about my own writing: its smallness, my quiet attempts to matter. I imagine someone reading my words and feeling the same thing I felt.…

  • Christmas was

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    a deep, muted navy blue carpet,soft under my feet and cheeks.

  • Lemongrass Face Smooshes

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    My walks with Gigi are not always perfect. She’s a terrier I haven’t taken the proper care to train, and because of that, she barks at every single damn dog she sees. It’s a nuisance, really.

  • Five Holiday Films

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    The tree isn’t up, there isn’t a twinkling light in sight. The only evidence of Christmas spirit in my home is a Fir-scented soy candle from Whole Foods. Oh, and these Savage Fenty pajama bottoms: LOL Despite my dulled enthusiasm for the holidays this season, I’ve already watched most of my favorite Christmas movies to…

  • Crying is bad for backs

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    Pain, especially physical pain of an excruciating nature, is a surreal thing. If you’ve never experienced it on a crippling scale, the kind that humbles you, it can be hard to relate. It’s been four years since my last serious back episode, and this one completely shattered me. It was enough to make me pause,…

  • Take a Nap-a

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    I fall asleep gigglingto Sarah Jessica Parker as Carrie Bradshaw,Recognized by all asAnnoying or beloved—For her shoe addiction,Her emotional bigness over Big’semotional avoidance,Or the missed chance withFurniture-making, golden-retriever Aiden. But I see her differently:A pun-loving comedy genius,Staring at buildingsJust before she leaves them. I’ve rewatched this showOnce every decade since my teens.And now, at thirty-eight,It…

  • it’s December

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    I wake up with my hands wrapped around his stomach like a seatbelt. I can hear Gigi fidgeting in her crate when I open my eyes to not the kind of darkness that tells you it’s okay to keep sleeping, but the kind of darkness that hints at a sunrise pending. Nothing’s particularly different or…

  • cassatt would’ve loved Gigi

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    A few things about this essay. It was written for an Understanding Visual Art course. I didn’t see this piece in person; my cousin Sam did, and she immediately sent it to me and bought me the print. I cherish it so much. So, yes, for continuity purposes, I fibbed in my opening paragraph. I…